I don't know, but I think I may be falling for you  

Dropping so quickly, maybe I should keep this to myself 

Wait until I know you better, I am tryin' not to tell you, 

but I want to, I'm scared of what you'll say, 

So I'm hiding what I'm feeling,

But I'm tired of holding this inside my head .
I've been spending all my time just thinking about you,

I don't know what to do, I think I'm falling for you.

Chris

It's the end

Around 9 hours more to the end of 2011 and to the start of the infamous apocalyptic year, 2012. Time didn't fly that fast for me this year, amazingly. Felt like I was slogging it out through out the whole year, like I was keeping count of the ticks of the clock all the way. So how was 2011 ?

2011 has been a very interesting year right from the start. 2010 was a good year, lots of events and great memories to cherish. 2011 was just ... interesting. Plenty of twists and unexpected events happened through out the year.

Found my true friends, and unexpected friends to be at my side.

Been blessed greatly by Cheryl who became by big sister, who knew ?

Met Janice and Sonia Lee ! Crazy ... I know !

Cousin Daniel's wedding in Singapore !

Prefect Dinner 2011 !

Got closer to Benji, Bryan, Jared and the girls.

Survived SPM.

Overwhelmed by the people who blessed me so much this Christmas.

 *Didn't take photo of presents*

 It's just been .. one interesting and good year I guess !

Not really that excited about 2012 for now, I rather stay in December at the moment. I think the reason to why I'm not that excited is because important people will be parting away from me. One will be going to Australia, and other friends will be parting ways in college. But I'm half excited about meeting new people and making new friends I guess. It's a whole new start, a whole new phase. I hope I make the best out of college while living for God ! :)

All in all, God has been with me through out the years. I tend not to notice it there and then, but looking back I always realize that God had his hand upon me all the time ! :) I thank you Lord for everything. May I continue to walk with You throughout 2012 knowing that I am assuredly Yours. :)

*P/S : I wrote this post on new year's eve, but forgot to post it.*

Chris

Blessed

You'll be leaving for good in less than 2 months.
I don't know what to say.
I know I'll definitely miss you greatly when you leave.
I've always wanted an older sister in my heart.
And poof, you appeared .. unexpectedly.
Who knew ?
That a someone like you would care for me ?
Still can't believe it till this day !
What can I say ?
You're like a God answered prayer.
Blessing me abundantly through out.
I truly thank God for you.
But, my only wish this Christmas,
Is to bless you back in return.
Thank you for making 2011 something special.
Love you big sister ! :)

God, please help me bless her this Christmas. :( I have no idea what to buy for her, sigh.

Chris

Day 2

This is day number 2 where I feel that God is continually working in my heart. Somehow ended up watching Fireproof, again. I watched it earlier on when I was younger and probably a little too young to comprehend the values and how incredibly heart-stirring this movie is. But now I'm starting to fully appreciate and comprehend what the movie actually teaches me.

Things needed to be applied:

1) Be more patient with my mummy.
2) Get rid of addictions.
3) Love girls/women the way God wants me to.
4) Purify myself before entering any relationship.
5) Base my relationships on God's love.

This isn't going to be easy. Lord, I pray for strength ? Cause I really can't do it on my own haha ! Please don't stop working in my heart. :)

Chris

Humbled

Just came back from the Orang Asli settlement. Went there to bless them by bringing Christmas to them and ended up being blessed much more in return in my opinion. I think we did a good job, some of us stepped out of comfort zones much more than usual, and I'm very proud of them !

But aside from the missions, it was a very humbling experience for me. Not because of anything to do with the missions, but I felt that the Lord showed me how small and broken I was in the trip itself. It felt pretty much like the story 'The Emperor Without Clothes' where the emperor thinks he has fashionable clothes and that he looks good, when in actual fact he is naked. He has nothing on and he's not fooling anyone.

Truth be told, I measure my value based on the talents I have. That's right, my value. I believe all of measure ourselves based on what we're good at. I've always held my talents dearly to myself, as it is the only thing that makes me feel worth something. But right now, everything is stripped away. What talents ? The Lord showed me that what I have is actually so small, that I'm broken and I lack in so many areas. That was the moment where I felt worthless. Like all your life savings is of no value anymore.

So what did I do ? Well, what else can I do but to go down on my knees and pray ? I prayed this simple prayer to the Lord.

"Lord, everything I have is Yours. All that I am is Yours. 

Lord, what I have may not be much to others or to You, 

but Lord take my broken offering and make it whole."

This verse came into my head when I was praying. 

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

- 2 Corinthians 12:9
 

What I have may not be much to others, but I'm going to give everything unto Him. I do not live to serve men, but I live to serve the Lord almighty. :) I believe this is the right thing to do, and I know I can't go wrong in giving my all to Him. I don't know who might be reading this, but I urge you to give everything to the Lord, be it how small or broken your offering may be !

Chris

Principles

Principles I need to live by and remind myself daily.

1) Be humble with all that I have, and in all that I do.
2) Be a blessing to others, not just a few.
3) Be generous in giving sincere appreciation.
4) Pursue after God's heart.

WeiBeng.

Dilemma

Sometimes we're so known by what circumstances have made us become, that people forget who we were before. Under circumstances, I have come to be known more as a guitarist till people forget that I'm actually a drummer and that drums is my main instrument. Sure, I may do the guitar thing, but I'm actually a drummer at heart and will always be.

Don't get me wrong, I love both drums and guitar and basically all the instruments. But just the thought of being a permanent acoustic guitarist for a band is something I really don't want. I've always envisioned myself as a drummer if I were to be in a band, but now I have been accidentally marketed as a guitarist and that seems to be what everyone wants me to be.

What's frustrating is that I have to sacrifice my first love (drums) to complement the whole team since no one else can take up the acoustic guitarist spot. I know the feeling would suck if I had to watch someone else take my spot on the drums while I'm stuck playing something else. Honestly, I never thought versatility would have its cons and here I am facing it.

How ? I'm left in a tight situation with not much options and I don't see a way out of it.

WeiBeng.