Where Emotions Meet Words

2012-01-06T10:55:00.002+08:00

I don't know, but I think I may be falling for you

Dropping so quickly, maybe I should keep this to myself

Wait until I know you better, I am tryin' not to tell you,

but I want to, I'm scared of what you'll say,

So I'm hiding what I'm feeling,

But I'm tired of holding this inside my head .
I've been spending all my time just thinking about you,

I don't know what to do, I think I'm falling for you.

Chris

It's the end

2012-01-01T01:50:00.003+08:00

Around 9 hours more to the end of 2011 and to the start of the infamous apocalyptic year, 2012. Time didn't fly that fast for me this year, amazingly. Felt like I was slogging it out through out the whole year, like I was keeping count of the ticks of the clock all the way. So how was 2011 ?

2011 has been a very interesting year right from the start. 2010 was a good year, lots of events and great memories to cherish. 2011 was just ... interesting. Plenty of twists and unexpected events happened through out the year.

Found my true friends, and unexpected friends to be at my side.

Been blessed greatly by Cheryl who became by big sister, who knew ?

Met Janice and Sonia Lee ! Crazy ... I know !

Cousin Daniel's wedding in Singapore !

Prefect Dinner 2011 !

Got closer to Benji, Bryan, Jared and the girls.

Survived SPM.

Overwhelmed by the people who blessed me so much this Christmas.

*Didn't take photo of presents*

It's just been .. one interesting and good year I guess !

Not really that excited about 2012 for now, I rather stay in December at the moment. I think the reason to why I'm not that excited is because important people will be parting away from me. One will be going to Australia, and other friends will be parting ways in college. But I'm half excited about meeting new people and making new friends I guess. It's a whole new start, a whole new phase. I hope I make the best out of college while living for God ! :)

All in all, God has been with me through out the years. I tend not to notice it there and then, but looking back I always realize that God had his hand upon me all the time ! :) I thank you Lord for everything. May I continue to walk with You throughout 2012 knowing that I am assuredly Yours. :)

*P/S : I wrote this post on new year's eve, but forgot to post it.*

Chris

Blessed

2011-12-19T01:11:00.002+08:00

You'll be leaving for good in less than 2 months.
I don't know what to say.
I know I'll definitely miss you greatly when you leave.
I've always wanted an older sister in my heart.
And poof, you appeared .. unexpectedly.
Who knew ?
That a someone like you would care for me ?
Still can't believe it till this day !
What can I say ?
You're like a God answered prayer.
Blessing me abundantly through out.
I truly thank God for you.
But, my only wish this Christmas,
Is to bless you back in return.
Thank you for making 2011 something special.
Love you big sister ! :)

God, please help me bless her this Christmas. :( I have no idea what to buy for her, sigh.

Chris

Day 2

2011-12-15T20:42:00.000+08:00

This is day number 2 where I feel that God is continually working in my heart. Somehow ended up watching Fireproof, again. I watched it earlier on when I was younger and probably a little too young to comprehend the values and how incredibly heart-stirring this movie is. But now I'm starting to fully appreciate and comprehend what the movie actually teaches me.

Things needed to be applied:

1) Be more patient with my mummy.
2) Get rid of addictions.
3) Love girls/women the way God wants me to.
4) Purify myself before entering any relationship.
5) Base my relationships on God's love.

This isn't going to be easy. Lord, I pray for strength ? Cause I really can't do it on my own haha ! Please don't stop working in my heart. :)

Chris

Humbled

2011-12-11T20:06:00.004+08:00

Just came back from the Orang Asli settlement. Went there to bless them by bringing Christmas to them and ended up being blessed much more in return in my opinion. I think we did a good job, some of us stepped out of comfort zones much more than usual, and I'm very proud of them !

But aside from the missions, it was a very humbling experience for me. Not because of anything to do with the missions, but I felt that the Lord showed me how small and broken I was in the trip itself. It felt pretty much like the story 'The Emperor Without Clothes' where the emperor thinks he has fashionable clothes and that he looks good, when in actual fact he is naked. He has nothing on and he's not fooling anyone.

Truth be told, I measure my value based on the talents I have. That's right, my value. I believe all of measure ourselves based on what we're good at. I've always held my talents dearly to myself, as it is the only thing that makes me feel worth something. But right now, everything is stripped away. What talents ? The Lord showed me that what I have is actually so small, that I'm broken and I lack in so many areas. That was the moment where I felt worthless. Like all your life savings is of no value anymore.

So what did I do ? Well, what else can I do but to go down on my knees and pray ? I prayed this simple prayer to the Lord.

"Lord, everything I have is Yours. All that I am is Yours.

Lord, what I have may not be much to others or to You,

but Lord take my broken offering and make it whole."

This verse came into my head when I was praying.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

- 2 Corinthians 12:9

What I have may not be much to others, but I'm going to give everything unto Him. I do not live to serve men, but I live to serve the Lord almighty. :) I believe this is the right thing to do, and I know I can't go wrong in giving my all to Him. I don't know who might be reading this, but I urge you to give everything to the Lord, be it how small or broken your offering may be !

Chris

Principles

2011-11-06T23:39:00.001+08:00

Principles I need to live by and remind myself daily.

1) Be humble with all that I have, and in all that I do.
2) Be a blessing to others, not just a few.
3) Be generous in giving sincere appreciation.
4) Pursue after God's heart.

WeiBeng.

Dilemma

2011-08-26T18:55:00.000+08:00

Sometimes we're so known by what circumstances have made us become, that people forget who we were before. Under circumstances, I have come to be known more as a guitarist till people forget that I'm actually a drummer and that drums is my main instrument. Sure, I may do the guitar thing, but I'm actually a drummer at heart and will always be.

Don't get me wrong, I love both drums and guitar and basically all the instruments. But just the thought of being a permanent acoustic guitarist for a band is something I really don't want. I've always envisioned myself as a drummer if I were to be in a band, but now I have been accidentally marketed as a guitarist and that seems to be what everyone wants me to be.

What's frustrating is that I have to sacrifice my first love (drums) to complement the whole team since no one else can take up the acoustic guitarist spot. I know the feeling would suck if I had to watch someone else take my spot on the drums while I'm stuck playing something else. Honestly, I never thought versatility would have its cons and here I am facing it.

How ? I'm left in a tight situation with not much options and I don't see a way out of it.

WeiBeng.

Kwon Yuri

2011-08-24T21:46:00.001+08:00

Damn, my friend has definitely passed on the Korean fever to me when she introduced me to SNSD. I think I have a major fan crush on Kwon Yuri now after watching this video of her.

I'm .. truly .. captivated.
I think I'm .... in love. HAHA

This is really bad timing. SPM is around the corner and here I am being distracted. Howwwww ? :( God help me, seriously.

WeiBeng.

Hahaha

2011-08-21T00:06:00.000+08:00

Thank you Cheryl for making my day!

You are the best big sister ever.

Hugs !

WeiBeng.

Tribute

2011-08-18T17:50:00.003+08:00

I was bored, decided to do a tribute for one of

my favourite songs by Bethany Dillon.
It's my first time uploading to Youtube !

First time making a video too !
*omg I'm such a pro hehehehehe*

Enjoy.

WeiBeng.

So good

2011-08-15T23:58:00.001+08:00

At this point in time, life is really good. Just celebrated my 17th birthday which was really close to perfect, the best I ever had so far ! Never felt so much love from people before, I feel really blessed !

My birthday somehow landed on the weekend, the weekend where my cousins and relatives from NZ came down to visit us and decided to celebrate my birthday ! Oh how I miss my cousin Teresa ! I really felt like hugging her, but I shy. :( She's really a bundle of joy and happiness, really can't help but smile when she's around. I remember those times when she played and took care of me when I was a kid whenever she visited, fond memories. :')

Beloved cousins !

School is going well for me. Making lots of new friends, friends I wished I had known earlier and not towards the end of my schooling days. Well better late then never ! God has blessed me abundantly, it's time I do the same. Hopefully I can somehow miraculously do well for my trials and SPM so that I can give all the glory back to God.

Jesus you are so good,

Jesus you are so so good,

and I just wanna thank You,

with every beat of my heart.

Just a thought, it would be perfect if Bethany Dillon accepts
my friend request on Facebook hehehe !

WeiBeng.

Realization

2011-08-09T22:52:00.001+08:00

I hate losing friends. Was just glancing through old photos on some of the things we did together, can't help but feel a little remorse for how things turned out. There are incidents that can affect and change your friendship forever, and that appears to be in this case. I hate this feeling.

I find it hard to truly forgive someone if they don't apologize. All in all, I will tell this to myself again. My conscience is clear, stop beating yourself up for what you didn't do wrong.

On another note, people don't usually turn out to be what you hope they would be. Ah, I can feel depression kicking in just thinking about this. It's entirely my fault for putting expectations and hope on people. Oh silly boy, what delusion have you gotten yourself into ? She was never going to be that to you.

This is a really depressing post, sorry to whoever that reads it. Just needed to let it out somewhere.

WeiBeng.

Overwhelmed

2011-08-04T22:00:00.000+08:00

It is currently about 100 days left to SPM. 30 days left to trials. Honestly speaking I don't think I'll finish my syllabus by trials, and that is making me very worried considering the fact that I'll be applying for college with my trials. Wasted time, is all I can say. I'm kicking myself upside down, literally if I could.

So how ? I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed right now. I really need someone to tell me everything's going to be okay. Can't wait to get SPM over with !

WeiBeng.

Bersih !

2011-07-05T16:31:00.007+08:00

Wearing Bersih T-shirts means instigating people to join the rally?

How about wearing police uniforms then ?

Does that mean you are asking people to join the police force ? -__-

Idiots.

WeiBeng.

?

2011-06-27T20:45:00.000+08:00

I feel so all over the place today.
I feel uncollected, unfocused, and a bit overwhelmed somehow.
I feel troubled, that I might have done something wrong.
That slight ache in your heart, telling you something isn't right.
Or perhaps when sleep fails to claim your consciousness.

I'm starting to have a headache. Not a good day at all.

WeiBeng.

Bethany Dillon

2011-06-16T18:10:00.000+08:00

Recently, I fell in love with a Christian artist named Bethany Dillon. She's an amazing song writer, an amazing mommy now too with a beautiful daughter. She's only 23 years old and she's a mommy already ! Anyway, I've been following her up on Twitter and I found her blog through there.

Needless to say, she's definitely a huge inspiration to me. Not just in musical sense, but definitely spiritually too. Her voice is amazingly .. pure and she sings the lyrics of her songs with such truth, it's unbelievable ! For me that is haha ! Through interviews and in her life, you can really see how spiritually matured she is from the way she views things and how she always gives glory to God.

"There's a clarity and an emotional immediacy and a real readiness to connect with her voice."

- Marshall Opman (Producer)

Reading her blog was really refreshing. It was all about how God works beautifully and holds her tiny hands through life being a mother/wife and an artist. Not to mention the really cute pictures of her baby daughter Lucy too hehe. :D Oh, and Bethany's actually quite pretty too ! Woman after God's own heart with a voice like that, she has to be beautiful. LOL! :D

Click here to read her blog !

WeiBeng.

Time

2011-06-07T00:26:00.000+08:00

The days seem long and weary

The sun hastens to set

Alas, time lingers everything

In a slow dreaded wait.

WeiBeng.

Laugh

2011-05-31T12:14:00.000+08:00

This made my day. :')

Definitely the cutest baby alive !

WeiBeng.

Jayesslee

2011-05-31T00:00:00.004+08:00

I WANNA MEET THEM ! :D
They're in Australia.
Only 3000 .. miles .. away.

WeiBeng.

Troubled

2011-05-30T00:20:00.001+08:00

Feeling very troubled.

I wish I could talk to you.

WeiBeng.

Maybe

2011-05-15T23:53:00.001+08:00

Is it possible to find a girl without drama ? I know that's quite close to impossible, as girl are emotional beings. But I just want a relatively simple girl who laughs more than she cries, that would rather choose to be happy and cheerful than being .. emotional.

Maybe I'm asking too much.

WeiBeng.

You are good

2011-04-20T10:40:00.001+08:00

I really have so much to thank God for, especially for amazing and encouraging people that God has blessed me with. :') Truly, God you are wonderful.

Anyway, this is a short update. I'm about to head off for my second game in my last year of high school basketball tournament. (MSSD) Body's feeling lethargic, but nevertheless by God's strength I believe by faith that I can pull this off ! :)

"Grant Taylor: And if we win, we praise Him. And if we lose, we praise Him. Either way we honor Him with our actions and our attitudes. I resolve to give God everything I've got, then I'll leave the results up to Him. "
- Facing the Giants.

Living by this principle ! :)

Lets do this !

WeiBeng.

Unfigured

2011-03-21T21:58:00.001+08:00

I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

WeiBeng.

Let go

2011-03-20T02:49:00.006+08:00

I think it has finally come to the point where I'm not that significant in your life anymore. I think this is the part where I should let go, back down, and back away. I don't think you really need me anymore, there already are so many great people there for you. How much difference can I make ?

If you want fun, I'm pretty sure he's funnier than me. If you need comfort, oh he did a pretty good job in camp didn't he ? If you want a good backup singer/worship leader, you got what you wanted didn't you ? I guess you really showed that you needed him more than me when you replaced me. :/ It's okay, you were afraid, and it appears that I couldn't help you this time, only he could.

I guess I'm not good enough. Twice the serving of another humble pie anyway. What am I compared to him right ? No wonder I was replaced haha ! Hmm, I'm going to stop worship leading. I think my confidence took a hit from all this.

They say all good things come to an end. Well, it's been great being there for you and helping you somewhere throughout your 15 years of life. Maybe it's time for him to replace me and be the better friend than I ever was.

Am I over thinking things ? I don't know.

WeiBeng.

Thoughts

2011-02-09T19:20:00.002+08:00

This Chinese New Year was just .. amazing. I realized how important and special family are. It's funny though, when you were younger you never really did appreciate all the small little things, and even the big things too sometimes. I guess with age, our eyes start to open up to the little small things and big things that our relatives do for us, and we start appreciating the significance of it.

I think just as how much Christmas taught me a lesson, CNY definitely did too. Looking forward to Deepavali, maybe I'll learn something too heh.

I've been rather reluctant to blog lately, because I feel that I should be telling all of this to someone, rather than to my blog. There's no point in having a great one way conversation with my blog is there ? But at the same time I don't want to abandon how much time and effort I've carefully placed into this blog either. :(

Yes, I just woke up sorry. I think a lot before and after I wake up. :D

Picture of The Day

A little bit crude, but I laughed because I did the same thing when I watched the show. ;P

WeiBeng.

Wonderfully me

2011-01-26T18:05:00.003+08:00

I'm a failure when it comes to carrying a conversation with a person I look up to.

I just go all .. somewhat nervous and tongue-tied.

Gah, that's the one thing that I hate about myself.

What a loser. :/

WeiBeng.

Church Dedication Service

2011-01-25T18:37:00.001+08:00

My church had a Church Dedication Celebration Service in occasion of our new building. I was in the Acapella group. Here are some of the pictures taken by Cheryl. :)

The crowd !

Yeah, we're that holy okay ! ;)

I hope your ears didn't bleed. Hee. ;P

Picture timee !

Manly and feminine pose fail. HAHA.

Sexy pink shirts + Cheryl. :D

Haha !

Gosh, I look really thinner and darker in the pictures. :( I should start avoiding the afternoon sun more. Play basketball in the sun some more lah ! :( I'm gonna cut my hair, I look so nerdy with long hair and I need to get .. fat. FAT.

WeiBeng.

Productive !

2011-01-19T19:23:00.001+08:00

I went to Sunway Hospital today, and bumped into my favourite teacher, Miss Foo. Easily one of the nicest teachers I've ever met. I was actually quite worried for her when an ambulance came to pick her up after she fainted/collapsed in school last week Friday. I asked her how she's doing, and she told me she's not really fine. I heard that she's been sick for a long while now from a friend. :( Nice people deserve a break, really.

On another note, I finally made an FD and a bank account under my name to bank in a cheque that I received for my results. The sum is quite little but .. nevertheless still something ! Now I have some idea on how banking system works and operates.

Thanks God !

I learned a few things about stock markets and trading with my dad. Actually I learned so much from my dad today. He taught me a lot of the practical things in life. Haha. I love my dad. :) What would I be without him. So today's been quite a productive day despite missing school, especially since I studied quite a bit more than my usual too. :D

"Today is the day the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it."

- Psalms 118:24

WeiBeng.

Mixed

2011-01-17T15:52:00.001+08:00

I have bad news and good news.

GOOD NEWS :

I'M DONE WITH PHCC !

´"`'~" \(´▽`)/ ''~'`"`

*Thank God*

BAD NEWS :

My Aunty said I look thinner. :'(

And she's right.

(ಠ_ಠ)

WeiBeng.

Faith

2011-01-14T22:30:00.002+08:00

I'm worship leading tomorrow.

My voice sounds really rough due to sore throat.

Confidence is dropping lower.

I'm not only scared, but kind of worried now.

God, I'm putting all of my hope in You.

Going to have to do it by faith.

WeiBeng.

Random

2011-01-12T23:39:00.001+08:00

When I'm done with SPM, I'll download all the seasons of Glee or lend all of them if anyone is generous enough *hint hint* and have a Glee marathon. :D I watched this video on Facebook where they did a cover of Teenage Dream by Katy Perry, and I swear I was speechless.

Here's the video if you haven't seen it :

Jaw dropping !

"309 days to SPM. Stop slacking Chris."
- Truly, your subconscious.

WeiBeng

:/

2011-01-09T19:56:00.001+08:00

I hate it when you look forward to talking to someone, and you get all tongue tied and blanked on what to say later. :( I think I have this problem that I over think things, then I will blank out at that moment itself. Used to happen all the time when I was playing drums for service. :/

I should think about it less, and go with the .. flow. Hmm, something to ponder on.

On another note, I'm in the acapella group for the coming Church Dedication Service event, and it's looking pretty good so far! Can't wait for it ! I think my church is filled with all sorts of talented young people, all hidden somewhere. Haha ! Today was an eye opener when I heard a few people sing. Good stuff. :D

I miss the musical, like all the hangout sessions. :( Short term nostalgia. Oh well, time to focus on school now.

WeiBeng

Yes we can !

2011-01-04T22:01:00.001+08:00

The dreaded first day of school as a Form 5 student didn't turn out as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, it turned out much better than I expected. I have good teachers for almost every core science subject, except add maths and physics. So thank You God for that.

I'm sitting all the way in front of the class now so that I won't sleep in class, and because all the ~~nerds~~ extremely hardworking people are also sitting there. Time to pick their brains and get all the ~~nerdish~~ positive vibe I can get. Heheh. :D

You know the feeling when you have a great plan worked out ? I love that feeling, especially when it comes to studies. Study Plan 2011 for SPM with Ben FTW ! Yeah, I can actually do this ! I CAN DO THIS !

I CAN DO THIS !!

Thanks Cheryl for all the encouragement ! :D

Now the question is .. commitment and discipline. ;( I hope I can religiously follow my study plan with Benny Bob Sern.

WeiBeng.

Started

2011-01-02T23:29:00.000+08:00

I predict I'll be very anti-social this year, or maybe not.
Just thinking about school makes me stressed.
Why stressed , you may ask ?

1. I'm not taking tuition.
2. I'm depending a lot on school teachers.
3. There are many useless teachers in school, unfortunately.
4. It's SPM year, good teachers are crucial.
5. I have responsibilities in the youth.
6. I have the whole form 4 syllabus to catch up with.

Here goes, the start of school.
Looking forward to 2012 already.
Oh well, another 363 days to go.
Yes I type like this when I'm rushing.
Goodnight.

WeiBeng.

2011

2011-01-01T02:52:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR !

Lord, I uphold this year 2011 to You.

* I missed the fireworks, damn. -_-

WeiBeng.

2010

2010-12-31T02:18:00.006+08:00

2010. This has been the most interesting, amazing, eventful, time flying year. This year has been packed with all sorts of events that I have never actually settled down and felt life was routine based at all.

So lets see what happened this year ..

I BOUGHT A BOOK

This is the first book that I actually bought in years.

Pretty amazing for a guy like me who likes to read books for free.

HANDBALL TEAM

Handball team !

We won first place! :) Me and Daryl tip-toeing with that 6 footer Manveer Singh. :D

HARI SUKAN

The dreadful day where we had to stand straight in the sun with our blazers for almost an hour. I swear I almost fainted when the super long winded headmistress gave her crazy long speech. I will never ever do perbarisan again.

ALFA UNITE

Superman ?

Cerlyn edited that and this picture was taken back in May during ALFA Unite. Seriously, too much of an coincidence ? Yes Cheryl, don't laugh. Haha !

PREFECT INSTALLATION 2010

Formalities.

The day I became a part of the EXCO board, and the day where I started seeing the brighter side of things. Learned a few important qualities that day.

FOURIAN FARE 2010

The first fare and big event that our school hosted.

Spent lots of time with my buddies and different people that day. :)

BENNY GREB'S DRUM CLINIC

I had a chance to take picture with my favourite drummer of all time !

You can see I was smiling like an idiot there. :D

PREFECT DINNER 2010

Our bucket drums performance !

Our group, what was it ? Holy Buckets ?

After dinner. Amazing right ?

The first time I actually bought flowers for a girl. ;)

My date of the night, Tracey! (Left)

Hottest twins I know and I managed to get them both to be my dates.

What can I say ? I got lucky ! :D

LIFEGAME

Awesome camp! I learned so much from there and rededicated myself to God. :) Also managed to meet so many incredible new people ! Not to mention the place and food there was really amazing.

CHURCH SHIFTING

The day where I became an old man.

I swear I couldn't get out of bed the next day.

BIRTHDAY

Jean Ann's birthday party. The only birthday party I attended this year.

Yes bromance, I know. I love my white boy. ♥

LEO EVENTS

The day I got installed as an official Leo member.

My first project !

INJURY

My first ankle sprain from basketball. Haha !

My right foot still looks bigger than my left now.

ONCE UPON THE END

I'm really happy that I was a part of this musical.

This musical is basically how my holidays and Christmas went,

and it really ended my year on a high note ! :D

-----

Well this year has been amazing from so many aspects. But I suppose the best part about this year was actually getting to know and get closer to people. :) The last chapter of 2010 is coming to an end soon. Thank You God for 2010. :')

Hello 2011, a year filled with challenges.

WeiBeng.

Reminder

2010-12-28T21:55:00.000+08:00

Be humble, be thankful, and be grateful with what

God has given unto you.

*Reminder to self.*

WeiBeng.

Once Upon The End

2010-12-27T13:49:00.002+08:00

The pictures from SJAG's very first in-house Christmas theatrical production, Once Upon The End is up ! Thank you Cheryl for taking and uploading the photos ! All photos were taken on the last day, except for a few. :)

GROUP PHOTOS!

Kent, Caleb, and Jane with their younger versions

Let the posing begin !

Yes I know lousy pose. :(

I love this photo. Peaceee !

ME.BROTHER.CHERYL!

My not so funny face

My brother's soldier face

First attempt failed.

Success !

ENSEMBLE PICTURES !

The whole Ensemble!

PHOTOS WITH PEOPLE!

Me, Benji and Cheryl

Me and Cheryl!

The awesome people who actually came !

Ryan, Ben, Me, Lilyan, Vivian

I texted them if they were there during the musical. Those liars said no transport, so depressing. :( But, I was so happy when I spot their faces during alter call. :D

A shot of me in war paint ?

EVERYONE !

The whole crew that made it happen!

Joining this musical was the best decision I made this year. I can't believe I thought twice on involving myself with this musical. Oh well, it's over now. :'( My Sundays will feel a tad bit weird with nothing to do and without chicken rice for lunch now.

WeiBeng.

Christmas

2010-12-26T01:34:00.007+08:00

Blessed Christmas Everyone!

I thought Christmas this year was going to be the worst I've ever had so far. Now looking back, it's interesting and very much relieving to see how God work and twist things around into something good. This year's Christmas is the best by far ! Truly, thank You for everything.

I'm truly reminded of the story of Joseph in the Bible. How things looked so bad for him and how hopeless the situation was for him, and God brought him out of it and turned him into the 2nd most important man in Egypt. I'm reminded of how God is in control over everything, things might look bad initially but always trust in God that in the long run, He will bring you through it.

This holidays, I've grown closer to someone, actually a lot of people in fact thanks to the Christmas musical. I became closer to the very much awesome people like Cheryl, Benji, Jeremiah, Jo, Sa, Drea and a lot more. I've always felt somewhat invisible in church, but not anymore. Haha ! Ah really blessed be Your name !

God, you've not only given me the best gift, your son Jesus Christ to die for me, but you've also given me this for Christmas this year. I don't know how to thank You. I hoped Christmas this year would be special, and it really turned out to be.

"So what could I say, what could I do, but offer this heart oh God completely to You." - Hillsong United

Edit: I made Sa's name bigger and in bold as her Christmas present. Heh. :D:D

WeiBeng.

Hmm

2010-12-24T12:26:00.005+08:00

Edit : I would take down this post because it doesn't mean anything to me anymore. But, I would want to keep it as a reminder of how I felt when I look back upon my life.

This Christmas, I gave you my heart,
But the very next day, You gave it away.
Next __ years, to save me from tears,
I'll give it to someone special.

"Live life without regrets. Life is too short to over think things.
Take a chance, how bad can it be?"

How bad it can be.

WeiBeng.

Decision

2010-12-23T00:34:00.001+08:00

And I guess I'll probably die of 'insatisfaction' so to speak without ever knowing the truth and with questions left unanswered. I don't have the heart to press on more questions since she can't do that for me. And if honesty among each other is what builds and holds a friendship , then .. I honestly don't know what our friendship will be based on anymore.

So I guess I'll swallow everything I had to say, and live with my insatisfaction, doubts, and insecurities that questions our friendship. I don't think I can bear to see her break down, even though I should be the one who's doing that. So I guess I'll have to endure everything because I know I'll handle the pain better than she would.

So may God help us with our friendship because I can't possibly rely on my own strength anymore. I've done my part, and I'm leaving the rest to God and to her.

WeiBeng.

A friend

2010-12-17T22:40:00.005+08:00

Based on my previous post below, this is a comment I got.

MHP said...
This is when the courageous could possibly win the lady~ otherwise, the only option left is to wish your friend joy and happiness at her wedding~

Sorry, the happy ending didn't work out for me. I'm just a friend, nothing more. Looks like I'll actually wish her joy and happiness at her wedding. Who would've thought the word friend could be such a depressing word ?

Nice Guy video by WongFu productions

Just for all the nice guys and good friends out there, I'm a testimony to how this ending isn't even slightly remotely true. So think twice before telling a girl that's close to you on how you feel. Think twice, even though your chest feels like bursting, and I wish you all the best of luck.

WeiBeng.

Complicated

2010-12-15T19:55:00.004+08:00

Life is complicated when a girl walks into the picture. Feelings will get in the way, your "what ifs" will whisper at the back of your mind, the fear of messing up will creep up, and most of the time you don't know what to do, or rather I don't know what to do.

Things just get more complicated when you're a good friend of mine, and I would hate to do anything that would jeopardize our friendship. I don't want drama. I can bury my feelings and let it die with time just for the sake of friendship. I've done it before, but why can't I do it with you?

All this while, I've always been there for you, supporting you all the way and just being a really good friend to you, despite my feelings and how I really felt about you. I thought I could continue to bury my feelings and not take the risk of jeopardizing our friendship, but I can't , not after seeing you with him.

Seeing you and him together made me realize how important you are to me and how sick my stomach felt. I just have to tell you how I feel about you because as cheesy as it will sound, I really feel like my chest is going to explode. But I don't know how, or if I should. This is exactly what I'm afraid of messing up, because you're too important to me.

WeiBeng.

December

2010-12-03T22:50:00.007+08:00

Hello readers ! I've been quite busy with events and planning events lately, so I haven't really had the chance to just sit down and collect my thoughts on what happened through out the past week, until now.

Have been spending quite some time with Jo, Benji, Sa, Mel, and Drea lately with church stuff. This is a good sign as I'm opening myself up to people now. Great. Sa painted my nails with ugly non blending colours when we went out to buy things. It all happened so fast I didn't know what was happening until it was too late. :(

Pink , green , and yellow.

Actually all 5 of my nails were painted, I literally scratched the paint off the other two because I felt too feminine. Yes it looked ugly scratched off, but guys aren't supposed to look pretty with pretty nails. :D I'm literally going to bandage my nails when I go out.

Anyway, it's the month of December. The last chapter of the year 2010. It's been one interesting year, but I'll save that for another post by the end of this month. Christmas is coming up! I've stopped feeling 'Christmassy' and stopped giving and receiving presents since I was twelve. Time to embrace the Christmas spirit again!

EVENT AHEAD

Christmas Musical 2010

"Once Upon The End" - Jewel Yip

23rd & 24th of December

SJAOG Church (My church.)

If you want to see me acting, dancing, and singing, *sigh
then please do contact me for further details.

Kidding. Would be great if you guys came ! :)

I hope Christmas this year would be special. :)

WeiBeng.

Stunned

2010-11-23T21:00:00.006+08:00

I need to get away from my house. Why? No, I didn't have an argument with my parents and decided to be crazily dramatic and over react by wanting to run away. I just .. need to stay away from the computer. It's sucking the life out of me. How to study and be more productive when it's being a temptation right in front of me?

On another note, I just watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Now, I've never really been much of a Harry Potter follower considering I've only watch the first, the third and the fourth, but I ended up watching anyway. I thought Emma Watson was stunning in Goblet of Fire, but she looks amazingly more stunning in this latest one.

Emma Watson.

I think I'm in love. ♥

She's just so beautiful and elegant with so much poise.

I would take beauty and elegance (Emma Watson) over hot and sexy (Megan Fox) any day. I think it's fair to say guys get attracted in two ways. Our heart gets attracted to beauty, elegance, poise, personality etc that makes us fall in love. Where as our hormones gets attracted to .. hot and sexy girls with amazing bodies, a pretty much shallow and short lasting attraction. :/

I think I'm gonna start watching all the Harry Potter movies especially the ones I missed, then I'll read the books. Anyone want to lend me ?

WeiBeng.

All for nothing

2010-11-10T21:03:00.003+08:00

I feel as if my social life has been declining rather rapidly. It seems like I don't know how to talk or carry a conversation with people anymore. I'll admit it, I am officially a social retard now.

I feel like I've closed myself from the world and just obsessed myself with music and videos. I don't know how to mix with people anymore. Maybe I'm not hitting straight to the point, maybe what I meant is I don't know how to mix with the people I WANT to mix with anymore. Then again, maybe I never really knew how to in the first place.

Relationships. I've put so much effort into some of them, but everything seems to be going stagnant or declining even. To put so much effort, and watch it go in vain over time. Great isn't it. I feel like a failure when it comes to relationships that I care about some times.

What else to do, but to trust in You.

WeiBeng.

Holidays

2010-11-03T12:00:00.003+08:00

Exams are over and the year end holidays are finally here. This year end holidays is definitely crucial on how I'll start off the next year for a better tomorrow begins with today. As to make sure I keep myself focused and on track, I'll put my goals that I MUST achieve next year.

Straight A's for SPM
Qualify for MSSD basketball 2011
Top 20 in Fourian Run 2011
Serve God more in the Music Ministry

These are the important goals that I have to achieve. There are other things that I would LIKE to achieve , but not as crucial as the above. Obviously No.1 is the most crucial as it is on the top of the list. I would like to end my high school life on a high note, so I can think back and know I didn't bum around and wasted my high school life.

So the following would be my holiday plan:

Jog twice a week
Finish up Form 4 Syllabus
Do something crazy with friends
Basketball workout
Spend more time with people
Get closer to someone (No hidden meaning.)
Do something I've never done before
Learn the bass/piano
Learn a new program (Audacity, Photoshop etc.)

A better year ahead begins with the year end.

Cheers to 2011 ..

WeiBeng.

Ironic

2010-10-15T00:41:00.002+08:00

It's funny how I go around helping you when I'm the one who's in need of help, and you don't see it. I feel like I've become just only an emotional crutch to you somewhere along the line when you're down with problems and in need of someone to appreciate you. I guess I used to be something to you, something much more. It doesn't feel that way anymore. I guess whatever interest I used to have to you has worn down over time and I'm nothing but just a good friend that you come to for encouragement in times of need. It really feels that way now.

I'm sure you could see that there was something wrong with me, but you never asked what's wrong. I was hoping you could be there for me just as how I've always been for you, but you weren't. Maybe all you just want is my attention when nobody seems to care, and when you do meet this much more fun exciting person who gives you that, you don't need me anymore.

I'm that spare part that you need the most in times of trouble and when you're down. But once you find that brand new shiny part that replaces me, I'll be left aside. And when things don't work out with that brand new part, you'll be looking for me again. Yes, and I'll be there for you again because you need me, not because you want me.

I'm just a nice guy and a good friend to you, nothing more. I guess this is what nice guys get.

WeiBeng.

Hope

2010-10-13T00:12:00.002+08:00

Everything's going to be fine. Keep telling yourself that and eventually you might believe it. Hope is great when you receive it , but it's devastating when you thought you had it but you actually don't. That's why hope is so tricky , the ability to make you happy and also sad.

You thought you had it, but it slips away.

I hate this feeling , I really do. It's funny how one ______ can make you feel that much. Unbelievable.

WeiBeng.

Fairy Tales

2010-10-10T19:47:00.001+08:00

It's not real, just a thrill

All you have to do is step into reality

Made up stories, only lies

They do not exist, your so called

Fairy tales.

It's time for me to wake up and step into reality. Sigh.

WeiBeng.

Happenings

2010-10-05T00:20:00.003+08:00

I've been miserable being stuck at home because I twisted my right ankle during sports. My ankle and foot is so swollen now I don't even recognize it. I think I'm definitely injury prone if I absent myself away from sports for a long time.

I even bandaged my ankle with a belt around it to keep it firm.

Look at the difference.

I hope it'll be okay by this Saturday hopefully ! Tomorrow, I'll be going school with my ankle in this condition. I wonder how much sympathy and concern I can get from the girls. *grins* Plus, I get to maybe scare one or two PMR students too! ;D

Anyway, I've been gorging out the inner Chinese in me lately. I've been listening to Chinese music non stop for the past two days. Well actually only one Chinese song in particular , and it's probably the only Chinese song that I like. By the way, Chinese male singers sing crazily high.

Go Jason Chen !

I feel Chinese now, like really Chinese. Beware.

Don't be surprise if I start speaking to you in Mandarin suddenly. Heh. ;)

WeiBeng.

I need You

2010-09-27T22:03:00.000+08:00

Give me the strength,

Give me the perseverance,

Give me the obedience,

and give me the self control,

to walk with this walk with You.

WeiBeng.

Declining

2010-09-23T00:04:00.002+08:00

Things are good.

Things were good,

and it's going down the declining path , again.

I hate this feeling , I really do.

And it's mostly because of you.

WeiBeng

Back again

2010-09-20T23:45:00.010+08:00

Holidays are over and it's back to our normal daily routine. 2 months left of school , and this is like the bazillion time I'm saying this , 2010 is passing by extremely fast.

Just last week give or take , we celebrated Jean Ann's birthday. It felt like it was yesterday , but it's already been a week. Amazing. I love this photo although I look kinda gay in it , but we're all happy !

Happy ~~gay~~ moments !

By the way , our church human chain photo has won RM50 from The Stars newspaper which can be found here! YAY.

Look at that strong ~~handsome~~ young man. :D

On another note , just want to thank God for being faithful ! If you have noticed the emo post below , things have been rather awful this past few days for me. But things are good now and hopefully better.

I shall continue to praise You through the good and bad times !

WeiBeng.

Played

2010-09-17T22:05:00.002+08:00

Tell me it isn't true.

Tell me you didn't say that.

Tell me you meant what you said.

Tell me that you're still the same person I thought I knew.

Cause I'm lost now.

What am I to you , really?

WeiBeng.

Another day

2010-09-16T19:55:00.001+08:00

Today , my church had a major shifting of stuffs from chairs to tables to partitions and to all sorts of other heavy stuff to the new church building. When I say heavy I really mean HEAVY.

I think I've easily carried more than 500 chairs up and down staircases, 20 over partitions up staircases, and dozens of other heavy things back and forth. My back is almost breaking , I can't even turn left or right now. I feel like an old grandfather , or rather I'm acting like one now. :D

The Human Chain

Thank You God for blessing us with a new building!

On a side note , I'm feeling confused and I'm tired of playing the guessing game in my mind. I hate receiving mixed signals , because I don't know how to interpret them. God , I leave this up into Your hands for You know what's best for me.

WeiBeng.

LiFEgame 2

2010-09-14T19:25:00.020+08:00

Now for some of the pictures , I didn't take many though. :( Didn't take any photos in the game itself , only photos before and after the game.

*Here goes*

On the first day

Sam !

Sam , Simba , Leila !

The three absolutely cute golden retrievers at El Sanctuary, our campsite!
Don't you feel like hugging them ?

The amazingly great hotel class food served at El Sanctuary.
Amazingly generous with their servings too !

Worship session , me on the drums!

Me and Melissa !

Me and Drea !

On the last night !

All the campers !

I'm still missing some pictures though , especially the one with Philip ! :(
Anyway, really good memories ! :D

WeiBeng.

LiFEgame

2010-09-13T12:31:00.011+08:00

Just came back from LiFEgame which was held in Malacca. What is LiFEgame actually ?

LiFEgame™ is a creative simulation game of life that seeks to provide an environment for participants to discover God's purposes for their lives in this world. A "make-believe" world is set up in a camp or retreat environment where participants are given the opportunity to live out their whole lives however they wish. Starting at age 15, they begin to pursue their dream, get an education, find a job, buy their first car, purchase a house, get married, raise a family, and climb the ladder of success. Every hour they will age 5 years and they have to take care of their personal needs like food, clothing, health, etc.

Like in real-life they may face health problems, accidents, fines, or even death as a result. No one knows how long they will live. Some might die prematurely while others may retire at a ripe old age before they meet their creator face to face.

LiFEgame is about living life and that's where the reality of the real world sets in. Eventually each participant question, "What's the point of life?" and that, is the whole point of the LiFEgame -an opportunity to discover God's purpose for living.

I had no idea it'll turn out to be this impactful ! I always wondered how were they going to do a simulation on life and actually feel like you're experiencing life in just 4 days ?! But it was a success , I really felt like I experienced life in 4 days, and I learned many valuable lessons. Attending this camp was definitely one of my best decisions in life.

One of the many photos, more photos to come!

YOU should go.
Especially if you're still young
and you don't know what you want in life!
I promise you , it will impact your life.

Interested? For more information go to -
http://lifeimpactministries.com

More pictures in the next post.

WeiBeng.

In a day

2010-09-06T23:57:00.012+08:00

Had a great time playing ball at Summit USJ indoor court with Ken Vun and friends. Just a few photos , try to spot me if you can.

Went to church at night for music practice , man it was so refreshing playing on a good drum set. Got to see some bass action from Ps Willard , pretty sick stuff. All in all a good day, and I'm very happy to start my holidays off this way.

By the way , check this video out.

I only like this video because of the girl, Julia. She has such such such an amazing voice and she's unbelievably pretty. I wish I knew her. :( MattyB ? Who ?

WeiBeng.

Next up

2010-09-03T21:08:00.005+08:00

Holidays are here ! Looking forward to all the events and activities that's coming up in this 2 weeks. Oh , and I waxed Joshua's leg today , pretty awesome stuff. :D

Anyway, a very Selamat Hari Raya to all Malays and everyone celebrating it ! *hintIlikeopenhouseshint*

So what's up ?

Lifegame on the 8th - 11th September !
Registrations are closed. Sorry.

Yes, that's basically the highlight of the holidays other than hanging out with friends, playing sports and .. studying. :/ I really really need to go out , someone call me out !

The world is still gray by the way, and I don't know why.

WeiBeng.

Fellowship

2010-08-30T00:55:00.004+08:00

What I learn today ,

Fellowship is important, we work better with fellowship.

- Lion Andy aka Dandylion

I became a good citizen today and cleaned the park from millions of cigarette buds littered all over the park. If picking up cigarettes were like picking up 10 cents , I could have easily sworn my allowance for a few months would be covered.

I like what Lion Andy said today, very interesting. It's the fellowship that makes everything worth while, that pushes us to do the extra mile, and the reason why we come back to do more. So in all that we do, do it with fellowship ? :)

I actually like this picture a lot.

I think becoming a Leo member might be one of the best choices I've made in high school considering the fact that I get to serve my community
and considering the fact of how many girls I get to meet. Heh.

P/S DandyLion is such a cute name right ? :D

WeiBeng.

Declaration

2010-08-28T21:27:00.004+08:00

I will live to love You,
I will live to bring You praise,
I will live, a child in awe of You.
Till I see you - Hillsong United

Everyday, it's You I live for.
Everyday, I follow after You.
Everyday, I walk with You my Lord.
Everyday - Hillsong United

God I offer my life to You,
Everything I've been through, Use it for Your glory.
Lord I offer days to you, lifting my praise to You,
As a pleasing sacrifice, Lord I offer You my life.
Lord I offer my life to you - Hillsong

Lord, this are words of declaration for my life.
I pray that I'll actually live the lyrics above for You.

WeiBeng.

A single step

2010-08-27T01:23:00.005+08:00

I'm back on my feet , slowly finding the strength to fix things back to how it was. In moments of my confusion, I screwed a lot of things up from studies to relationships.

The journey of a thousand miles begins with single step, henceforth fixing one thing at a time. I'm glad I met you, for I would have never found the strength to find where to start.
Thank you.

WeiBeng.

Gray

2010-08-25T20:50:00.005+08:00

The world seems so gray.

I'm hoping YOU will be sunshine.

WeiBeng.

Flashback

2010-08-20T20:49:00.008+08:00

It's been so hectic after my last post, and now I'm finally free enough to blog. I'll just give you the highlights that happened from July till now. :)

Benny Greb's Drum Clinic -

He's just tall.

The clinic was the bomb. Would have cried and gone into depression if I missed it.

Prefect Annual Appreciation Dinner '10 -

The guys before dinner .

Our group, Holy Buckets !

My date of the night, Tracey Lovett!

The Bob Family

Bobbin, Bob Sern, D-Bob, Subob, K-Bob, Bobnard, Wei Bob, Bobcey.
Why Bob ? It's a long story.

The guys after dinner .

The team that made it all happen .

Leo Installation '10 -

That's my school !

Had a great time there, did things I've never did before with Bob Sern. The socializing was great, and so was the company. :)

Yes I left out my birthday, didn't do much this year. Wait till I get my license. ;) So basically that's all the highlights from then to now. Oh, and I just finished my August exams.

WeiBeng.

Here it comes again

2010-07-20T22:25:00.003+08:00

This whole month , has been a mess .
It went from hectic , to a crazy roller coaster emotional head aching ride .
I lost focus on everything .
Haven't been myself this whole week .
I pretty much think I blew my chances .
Wait , I more or less screwed it up directly or indirectly .
I'm tired .
It's time to take a break from this .
A long one .

WeiBeng.

Taking chances

2010-07-13T19:09:00.004+08:00

" When one door closes, another opens . "

I've literally experienced this saying first hand, and this saying really gives me some encouragement to really just take risks and plow your way through and who knows, you might actually make it.

But I just want to thank God for everything. I thought "THIS" was what God had intended, but maybe not so now. So who knows, "this" door is kind of half way closed , left somewhat ajar, and what do you know, another door opens ! Really, just wanna thank God for that.

I know you are kind of left in the blur , you're what wondering what is "this" ? It's something that I was chasing after, something that I wanted, something that I prayed to God about, something that I was hoping God would answer. But all in all , I always understood that if things don't go my way, it's okay because I know God's ways are much higher than mine.

So what can I say and what can I do ? But to continue to put my hope and trust in God. :)

WeiBeng.

Pause

2010-07-06T23:49:00.003+08:00

There's just too much going on, and I'm really really scared for my studies. I haven't studied for weeks! Form 4 honeymoon year ? Here's my .. to you all who said that.

I don't know if it's there's too much going on in this year, or too much going on in this form. I just want a pause button right now because I'm tired of playing 'catch up' already. This month is a crazy month, and it's only the beginning! It's going to get a whole lot crazier, definitely.

I'm just tired of all the prefect stuff. I can honestly say I put in more effort into all this prefect stuff than into my studies. :/ Or maybe because girl problems are clouding my head and draining the life out of me which is what that's making me tired. Oh boy, this is bad .

I just want a goodnight sleep waking up tomorrow with nothing to do. You know that feeling ?

WeiBeng.

Disarrayed

2010-07-05T20:42:00.004+08:00

Somewhere in my chest, there's a heavy throbbing feeling that's aching deep within. Do you know that feeling? Cause I don't know what to do with it.

2010 , you are one heck of a year. It's only half the year and you've already put me through so much. If only life could give me a few answers that I need, things would be so much easier. Then again, I guess finding the answers is what makes life interesting isn't it?

But I'm scared to know , and I'm dying to know.
Someone help me.

WeiBeng.

Heartfelt

2010-07-03T01:02:00.002+08:00

If you're not going to give me something I deserve, don't give me anything at all. This is where looking at things on a brighter side really comes in. I feel disappointed, unsatisfied, unappreciated, unnoticed, and sore. A heartfelt thank you to you all.

WeiBeng

July

2010-06-30T21:43:00.005+08:00

July, is a month in the year of 2010 where it's going to be one of the most hectic, tiring, surprising, fun, memorable, and definitely life changing month.

General meeting is tomorrow, where I'll find out what post I'll be getting as a prefect. Prefect Installation is on July 12th, the day where I take on a new role and post. I'll probably be laughing at any post I get, because I'm really happy with anything and I can be , me! :)

Next up, Benny Greb's clinic!

Benny Greb, my favourite drummer is coming to Malaysia! I'm happy he didn't drop by Singapore and leave Malaysia behind like how Paramore did. I really can't wait to get a picture with him (If I can .. ) and get his autograph and scream like a little girl when I see him live doing his thing on the drums. Okay not like a little girl , a .. heck I'll still be screaming my butt off.

Next on the list, my dad's birthday!

Sorry, I don't have a picture with my dad stored in my computer! But since I'm so good looking you should know where I got my good looks from lah right? :) :) :) :) So there's no need for pictures, a good imagination would do! Kay, I'm joking if you haven't figured that out by now ..

Following up....!

Church events! Going to orphanage, then helping out in Mamak Night Open Mic with Pappa Tim! Should be lots of fun ! :D

And next ..

Prefect Dinner 2010 on July 30th! Organizing by my form ! Lots of organizing, planning and preparation. It's going to be lots and lots of fun! Hahaha! Really can't wait. :)

Last year's.

WeiBeng.

Trusting in You

2010-06-16T02:44:00.003+08:00

Something that I realized during camp. Although it's not in conjunction with the theme or the sermons, it is something I've come to learn.

Matthew 6:33 says

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all
these things will be given to you as well.

This verse is in line with our worries each day. We worry about so many things which sometimes takes our focus off God. So what we should do is put God first in everything and do not worry for God has already promised us that our needs will be seen.

Now to relate this to me. I've been thinking a lot about certain things and I realized that whatever it is, I should just serve God with all my heart and just really seek Him first and trust in His plan for me. I should put worries like money, education, emotions, and relationships in particular to Him and just serve God while I'm still young!

Jeremiah 29:11 says

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to
prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Thank you God for your promises.

WeiBeng.

The much needed break

2010-06-07T01:50:00.003+08:00

Mid terms are finally over! The much needed holidays has finally arrived after those 2 weeks of intensity and stress. Can you smell it? The relaxing smell of holidays, mmm.

No more sleeping late and waking up at 6am on weekdays.
No more 5-6 hours of sleep.
No more going to sleep knowing you have to wake up early tomorrow to study.
No more going through long long 2 and a half hour papers.
No more last minute cramming. (Thank God.)
No more scribbling on exam papers just to past time.

Honestly, this mid terms is by far the worst exam I've sat for my entire school life. It was just so .. taxing, stressful, and very much tiring during the whole 2 weeks mainly because I was so sleep deprived. Mid terms came to me at a full blow, screaming at me that last minute study is not going to cut it. :/

It's June, half the year has flew by. Time never really flew as fast as this year compared to other years. 2010, just what else do you have in store for me?

Anyway, what I'm really excited about the holidays are the NBA 2010 Finals, Church Camp 2010, and of course World Cup! This year is really happening, I can feel it. So much more is going through my life this year and I hope it'll all turn out well according to God's plan.

Big bro's day really spoke something to me through some of the messages. Pastor's sermon really nailed it the following day, is that to use my talents to serve others and God. I should, I hope and look forward to doing that. :)

WeiBeng.

thing(any+every)

2010-05-19T16:14:00.004+08:00

I finally bought my first book like in a long long time, and it's written by James Patterson. Not that I don't buy books lah, unless you count comics. Yes, I love Doraemon and I don't know why, it's just so stupid and yet somehow, interesting.

The cover of the book.

I've read the first 6 chapters, and it's really really interesting. But I can't afford to finish the book now, I have exams next week! :( I bought this book at the Taipan bookstore which just open about a few weeks back.

Anyway, Mr Lim taught us Biology for the first time, and he is way way way better than Pn Zauwiyah. The teaching standard must be quite low in Malaysia, because you'll only find every 1/20 teachers you meet that are actually worth while sitting in class.

Talking about teachers, I still remember Johnny Ong. I have yet to come across another teacher as inspiring as him. The difference between how our country does it and how other countries (US, Canada etc etc) is that our education system emphasizes on memory, and theirs emphasizes on thinking. Now, they want to change English back to BM on science subjects, really.. Malaysia boleh.

On another note, my online game is finally working! :D

WeiBeng.

Not too late?

2010-05-15T00:54:00.003+08:00

Found a tagged photo of myself.

Seriously, superman? LOL.

Hello readers. As you can see I started off this post with something random. :O
SO IT'S RANDOM POST DAY!
Sorry just being random. D;

Anyway, back to being serious. I think I'm beginning to open myself up a little bit better now around people. I know when I was young I was the most extremely talkative one, and somewhere along the way..

*suspense*

What?

You see right, the case for most people usually is from such a happy bubbly person to an emotional heart broken teenager. :( But that's not my case lah. I've never been into that emotional state.. not yet anyway.

And it's not because I don't like girls.

Actually, I'm not really sure how I got to where I am. :( Maybe the change was too gradual or maybe I was too ignorant. But hey, you know the saying

Change is never TOO late.

You're one step in the right direction now. :)

WeiBeng.

Another day

2010-05-11T23:16:00.006+08:00

Been busy studying for mid terms which is in 13 days. I must must at least get a B for my science subjects. (Bio, Chem, and Physics) I'm hoping that English would be a free A, and I'm trying my best for add maths and mod maths. History? Screw it.

Best part about form 4 is the new formats. BM and English are freakishly scary when teacher decided to give us a vague briefing on it. Hi there Form 4, we love you don't we? :) (Especially the teachers.) Fantastic.

Two thumbs up!

Currently, I'm in the midst of memorizing my oh-so-long BM oral on diabetes. I decided to take a break of course, that's why I'm here! :P Just praying I don't blank out tomorrow during the presentation. :/ Talking about chronic diseases isn't really my thing, which is why I should read more. -_-

It's 11.40 am now, should I continue memorizing or head to my lovely soft welcoming pillow that's seducing me?

WeiBeng.

Change

2010-05-07T21:01:00.008+08:00

I'm currently pondering on whether I should change my blog link. I created this blog when I was almost 13, so this blog is close to 3 years old now. I don't know, tambahlemakpls used to sound nice to me, rather than having your name as your link which is kind of boring. The thought of how random it was, was kind of appealing to me back then. :/

Talk about change, my email address really needs it. I don't know what I was thinking back then when I was 11 years old when I came up with it. I find it rather embarrassing when someone asks for my email address cause it's sounds really childish.

Some people find my address quite significant as it kind of "relates" to me, but truth be told my email is inspired from the Dandy comic superhero, Bananaman. Yes, I'm chinese and I can't really speak chinese, thus bananaman "relates" to me. Amazing, I know.

My source of inspiration. D;

I'm currently watching Gossip Girl now, unbelievable right? My faithful online game crashed on me ever since Streamyx had this connection problem thing, which they said it'll be fixed by 2nd of May. Until now my game still isn't working, and I think I'm going through a slight withdrawal. D; So what to do, I have the whole 1st season of GG might as well I just watch it since my game doesn't work. ;(

No, it isn't Maple if you're wondering.

I'm drained out, feeling a tad bit cranky, and my mum can't stop singing. I have a migraine now.

WeiBeng.

Clock's ticking

2010-05-06T18:01:00.004+08:00

I know I know, it's been 4 months plus since my last update. It's been quite sometime since I actually sat down and articulate my thoughts.

Form 4 life is busy, very busy. Form 4 is like the year which decides how your Form 5's gonna be you know. You take your studies lightly this year and there goes your SPM, and then there are so many events to organize and think through. Not to mention the whole EXCO thing too. Life's tough, I admit.

It's always been my policy never to complain about life, because you never know that life can get a lot worse than where you are now. I can't stand people that complain on how much life suck, I just feel like slapping them. D; If life sucks, do something about it. Complaining won't get you anywhere.

Thinking back, I'm actually grateful that I fooled around in my PMR year. I actually had tons of fun and I really enjoyed myself even though it was PMR year. Now there's just no room for slacking, so I pity those people who studied their asses off last year. At least I had that one year of fun that some didn't get. :)

Clock's ticking. *tick tock

I miss those times where even if you don't study, you still can score. :(

WeiBeng.

Unfigured

2010-01-24T20:36:00.005+08:00

I just have no idea why I'm doing this. I've written almost 3 entries but I just can't seem to publish it and end up deleting it. It's like I caught on something great to write on, and after writing 2 paragraphs I end up thinking

'Nah, this feels wrong.'

So I'll write something that can never go wrong, my life. How's life for .. me? Well I've made up my mind that if anyone answers fine to that question I'll actually ... nevermind. So life is pretty weird for me lately. This month of January has it's ups and downs. Some really great great times like youth service on the 17th was just incredible.

Then there's school, I guess school could be described as fine because that's the only suitable term that I find most accurate to. At least the class is more lively now with Joshua and Jeroni in it, and I still haven't thank God I don't have Fabian in my class. :D

I don't know about you, but have you ever had those days where you just seem to suck in almost everything you did? I had quite a number of those days in this month which would explain the downs. Unbelievable.

But the thing I hate the most is..

WeiBeng.

Indifferent

2010-01-12T19:41:00.000+08:00

I'm gonna blog even though no one reads my dead blog anymore. :)

Lets just say all this while I've been drifting on the waves of time without purpose nor a goal. I'm going where the flow takes me, and I'm tired of it. Every different year used to be the same year, the same old stuff.

I'm challenging myself to it differently this year. After doing a self analysis where there were questions like "What did you do this past few years that you're proud of?" I just can't seem to answer it.

I'm proud that I.. helped a lady cross a road? No.
I'm proud that I .. made someone new feel welcomed? No.
I'm proud that I .. made someone feel appreciated and loved? Not really.
I'm proud that I ..

This list beats Santa's list.

As you all know, everyone makes resolutions for a new year.
It's just a matter of actually accomplishing it.

Well for starters, I would like to say hi to every person that I know
even though I'm not close to him/her with a big big smile.
What about actually finishing up my homework and handing it in? :/
What about being more active in youth and serving God more?

It's time to stop being indifferent.

WeiBeng.

Smile!

2009-12-08T20:40:00.004+08:00

What is it about smiles that just makes you stare a second longer? What is it about smiles that just makes you feel light-weighted and warm? What is it about smiles that just makes you..............

Definitely not this kind of smile but..

To think of those cliche lines like everyone is beautiful in their own way, and it's true! They're beautiful if you just look hard enough. I'm just getting plenty of smiles lately, and I just can't help but think about it and try to freeze that smile in my mind. Yes, they're smiles from girls because if it were from guys then it would be really ........... wrong.

A smile cuts through a person's heart, or at least most of the time. (Unless you don't brush your teeth.) Smiling compliments your face, so smile more! ;D

WeiBeng.

Old fun times

2009-11-04T20:49:00.005+08:00

I went to school yesterday to do the performance, I guessed it turned out .. at best, okay only. But I had lots of fun in the prefect room playing Boggle and carom with the form 4's. Hahaha, really good fun times which makes me reminisce about the times we had together back in 2007.

Well, sad to say I only have one picture of me hanging out with them back two years ago. :( Hahaha, but it's pretty memorable. :P

Me, Aifa and Brynn playing Bluff aka BS.

Manveer created a new game called Ice Hockey Carom, pretty fun but lethal considering the amount of times your fingers get whacked. :( Hahhaaha, never laughed as much as I did yesterday for a long long time. :P

P/S Boggle is pretty interesting by the way. ;)

WeiBeng.

A milestone view

2009-10-27T21:16:00.005+08:00

I finally went to school today after 2 weeks of absence, and I got dragged into another performance. I can't believe I'm already involved in something so fast. I foresee my holidays as a different one compared to my previous holidays. :p It's going to be beneficial and definitely not just lazing around at home.I'm actually going to start add maths soon actually, make hay while the sun shines. :)

I don't know, I just have this really big interest in writing music and "filmography" (if that's a word) lately. I'm beginning to find a lot of talented artists in Youtube like the JS, Kevin Lien, David Choi etc etc and I find them very inspiring. Definitely want to work on those stuff during the holidays.

How's my list of things to do during the holidays? Let's see.. still stagnant! :p Can't help it though with this crappy internet connection. Every time during the holidays, the connection becomes crap. So irritating. :(

Oh yeah 1 more thing -

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY CHRISTY! :)

WeiBeng.

Caught in the moment

2009-10-25T01:29:00.004+08:00

It takes a word to make a thought. -

I'm just giving short glances,

After all, what are my chances?
If all I could do is stare,
like you would really care.

So I take an inch closer,
too afraid I'll end up like a loser.
If you could just sense my nervousness,
If you would care nevertheless.

So I hide behind this facade,
and put the poker face with my cards.

Hello people! No, I'm not being emotional, just writing about a situatio n in my head. :p Whether it applies to me that's up to you to find out. ;) Anyway short post for today. Just watched the movie "Pandorum" and will write my review about it tomorrow or later. :)

WeiBeng.

Song writing.

2009-10-23T20:51:00.003+08:00

The headache with writing a song is the lyrics. It's so hard to write a song without dumping in meaningless lyrics. If you see all the famous bands like AAR, MCR and others, the music is good but the lyrics are nonsensical.
LOL.

Don't worry, you can do it. I know you can cause
you have the talent. :)
- Anonymous -

Thanks! Will continue to keep striving with your encouragement! :)

WeiBeng.

Double delight.

2009-10-23T01:13:00.002+08:00

These girls are amazing twins! They having amazing voices, the looks, the personality, they have the whole package! I really hope they become famous and make a CD album. Yes yes, I'm officially in love with them. :p

0:06 Janice's grimace. So cute. :P

After how many years of surfing Youtube, this is the first time I actually subscribed to someone. Goes to show how good they are. Heh. :p

Anyway, the holidays are really killing me and my eyesight. I'll probably be wearing spectacles next year at the rate of how long I use the computer daily. Even the www is getting me bored already. :/

My shopping list for 2009:

1) Photoshop disc.
2) Handphone.
3) Basketball.
4) Basketball shoes.

WeiBeng.

Articulated thoughts.

2009-10-20T23:38:00.003+08:00

Is this the whole picture, or is this just the start?
Is this the way you love me? You're capturing my heart.
I used to try and walk alone, but I began to grow,
And when you tell me just to rest, I'm finally letting go.
I let go.

-Fireflight-

I'm going for an operation tomorrow, and I hate needles. Wish I never got into this mess.

Killing the holidays.

2009-10-19T20:03:00.007+08:00

Here's a list of what I'm planning to do: (Updated)

1. ~~Watch a movie.~~
2. ~~Hang out with friends. (lunch etc.)~~
3. ~~Play basketball.~~
4. Change my hairstyle.
5. Get my teeth done. :P
6. ~~Bang the drums and guitar!~~
7. Learn something new. (Audacity, Photoshop etc.)
8. Plan our performances for next year's prefect functions.
9. Write a song.

4 down, 5 more to go. I just played basketball with Sam, Patrick, Andy, Ken Vun and others at USJ 11 court today. It was good though, except for the blisters. Hahaha, probably should play more at that court. 4/1 is getting too crowded. :/

Anyway, these are some of the pictures from the Sunway Pyramid outing that I promised. *Steals them from Jean Ann's blog*

Lunch at Carls Junior.

Li Kenn

The movie we watched. Not bad. :)

Hahahaha, don't think the wrong stuff. ;)

That's all. Short update.

WeiBeng.

Fun times.

2009-10-16T01:54:00.004+08:00

I enjoyed myself today! ;D I actually did something with today instead of stoning in front of my computer watching Youtube. At least I don't feel so lifeless anymore. :P What did I do today? I went out with my buddies to Sunway, and it's the first time I went out with girls. D:

Let's see, we ate lunch, watched a movie, played pool, had a drink, and played at the arcade a bit. But I felt like, we went out with the girls but didn't hang out with them much. =/ I don't know, was stoning quite a bit in the afternoon. :|

Only took a few pictures, will be posting it up soon I hope because Jean Ann is too lazy to give them to me. -_- Lazy woman. Anyway, the girls and Li Kenn went back home at 7 and we stayed back for dinner at Sunway. Had lots of fun having dinner with Ben's parents, and dinner was great by the way! ;)

Here's a list of what I'm planning to do: (Updated)

1. ~~Watch a movie.~~
2. ~~Hang out with friends. (lunch etc.)~~
3. Play basketball.
4. Change my hairstyle.
5. Get my teeth done. :P
6. Bang the drums and guitar!
7. Learn something new. (Audacity, Photoshop etc.)
8. Plan our performances for next year's prefect functions.
9. Write a song.

I've taken out working, because why work now when I'm going to be working for the rest of my life right? So 7 more to go, so far. ;) I have to have something beneficial done this holidays, if not I'm going to feel stupid and lifeless. :D

Just another memory stone. ;)

WeiBeng.

Back to the blogging world.

2009-10-13T15:29:00.003+08:00

P M R I S O V E R !

Hello whoever is reading this dead-over-3-months blog! ;D I've abandon this blog for such a long time because of my trials and my PMR examination. Today was the last day of PMR, and now it's freedom. But from what..?

I don't know, I mean if I was like studying my butt off the whole year and finally I don't have to study anymore, then maybe I would feel something. But the thing is, I only studied around a month before PMR. :D So yeah, today was a real anti-climax. :/ How did I do? I think I did okay, don't really want to say anything so that I won't have to eat my words when I get my results back.

Here's a list of what I'm planning to do:

1. Watch a movie.
2. Hang out with friends. (lunch etc.)
3. Play basketball.
4. Change my hairstyle.
5. Get my teeth done. :P
6. Work? (Still thinking.)
7. Bang the drums and guitar!

Right now I'm just stoning because I don't know what to do. :/ Okay wanna go sleep.

WeiBeng.

It's been a long while.

2009-07-03T20:51:00.002+08:00

Woke up at 6.45 am, and debated with myself whether I should go to school or not. I decided I didn't have much choice because the debate was today, and I need those merit marks! :( I only have 73 merit marks! Why? Because of the damn blazer, I keep forgetting to bring it on Mondays!

Not because I don't do my duty or I came late whatsoever. :( Anyway, had fun doing sambutan in school, amazingly. When I found out today's debate was postponed to Monday, I was quite annoyed. I was lacking sleep and I came to school only for the debate.

Anyway, went back early and went to watch Transformers 2 with Daryl and the others. Dozed off twice in the movie, I was really sleepy okay. The cinema was quite empty, so I took up 3 seats and make myself comfortable! :P

I just went high on coke, seriously. Now I understand why Sharmaine gets high when she drinks coke. You just feel damn hyper and happy, somehow. I was laughing non stop for an hour or so at NOTHING. It's been a long while since I laughed that hard. Wooo, it felt good!

I'm fine now by the way. :P

WeiBeng.

Worth it?

2009-07-02T19:29:00.002+08:00

I've recently taken part in a debate competition in my school. My team was me, Ben Sern, and Daryl. Why? Because the certificate was so compelling. If you win or lose, you still get the certificate. So, I thought that I should just join it, and lose the first round, and get the certificate. :D

I've never had any real experience debating before. So on the day I decided to just try out, it was my first time doing it, with no whatsoever clue on how to debate? D: Like the rules, the structure, the POI's and what not. To our surprise, we actually won the first round.

So then we decided the next day that we wanted to lose, because we were becoming lazy to debate since our objective in participating was only for the certificate. But somehow, we still won, again. We really wanted to lose so that we could just go back to class and continue on with our studying because the debates took up almost the whole entire school day.

So we're now in the quarter finals, which is today. We really really really felt like just doing the debate half past six and get it over with. But somehow, our opponents were someone we COULD NOT lose to. :( It's Danielle's team man, no way we're gonna lose. So, we gave it our best, and we won, again. It was a close one, and we thought we would lose this round.

So tomorrow we'll be debating in the semis. From first round, to second round, to quarters, and now semis. Each round we wanted to lose. :( But please note this lah, we wanted to lose by giving all that we can. To lose sportingly, and not just do it half past six and let them win just like that. That wouldn't be very nice, would it?

So now we're the team who just learned how to debate 2 days ago, and reached the semis. The least we can get is 4th out of 32 teams which tried out. So I would say it's quite an achievement. :P We are against a school team this semi finals. If we win, I don't know what to say? LOL.

Not to brag on anything lah, just that it's really funny how we wanted to lose, and we get through everytime. =\

WeiBeng.

It's funny, really.

2009-06-17T20:03:00.003+08:00

I got back my exam results, and I didn't do so well. 2A's 3B's 1C. I got a C for my history. :( The paper was quite hard though, but no excuses, cause' I didn't study. Anyway, I roughly maintained my results, did better in some subjects.

It's funny, why when I tell people I didn't do so well in my subjects, they wouldn't believe me. They just give me the "No way, that's impossible" look. D: It's either they think I'm smart, or my cheeky grin just confuses them. :P

Later went for basketball at USJ 11, some LC *#*$(#()@*# came over to me and threatened to punch me. You know why? I was nicely sitting at the sidelines watching the game, and the ball was bouncing out of the courts, and he tried to be Superman and save the ball. But oh well, he's a retard, and retards don't fly. So he blamed me that I was blocking him from saving the ball.

Stupid idiot thinks he's Hanamichi. After he collected the ball, had the guts to come in my face and say "You better move, or I'll punch your face." I gave him the "Oh really?" look, knew he didn't have the guts to do it.

I was so tempted to re-arrange his face. But I thank God I'm a good Christian and avoid fights as much as possible. -__- Stupid idiot was asking for the colours blue and black on his face. The next time he tries to act gansta boy with me, I'll be painting his face with those colours.

Nothing pisses me off then people who talk the talk, but can't walk the walk. Talk like he's some genius in basketball, when he actually sucks. I meant if you're a pro then okay fine, talk all you want.

Dear God, I pray for patience, and not strength. For if You give me strength, he'll be dead by now. Amen. :)

WeiBeng.
Artist in the making.

Something I'm not.

2009-06-14T02:07:00.000+08:00

I feel that my surroundings have molded me into a person I'm not. I've been introduced to this slow pain so much that I'm becoming numb to how much it's changing me as a person.

I've always been the type who thinks, and probably thinks too much. Too much of thinking, and very lacking on impulsive actions. Which makes me hold back, which makes me smaller, and reserved. Maybe it's my fault, I've limited my mind to what I can do, and what I can't. The 'Can't List' is growing longer.

Why? Why did I turn out this way? What happened? Is this really me, or is this something I've become? Was I always this way? The questions that's been pinching me at the back of my mind. The important question is, how did this happen?

Surroundings. I've let my surroundings break me, and mold me to something I'm not. It's time to unbound myself, to no longer be a captive of my own surroundings. It's time to break the chain, and fly.

But it takes more then a hammer to break that chain.

WeiBeng.

Church Camp 09

2009-06-10T19:24:00.000+08:00

It's gonna be a very short post, all in all, very very the awesome! :) I got closer to a lot of the youths there, and I'm happy for that.

Thank you God for the wonderful experience.
Till next time.

WeiBeng.

Take me deeper.

2009-06-04T19:40:00.000+08:00

How has the holidays been for ya'll?!! It's been great for me, gaming 24/7! I've been so game deprived that I literally acted like I just got out of prison when I started playing computer games again! :P

I'm going to enjoy this whole week, then next week start studying. :) I don't want to lose my momentum after studying so much for my exams. Oh yeah, haven't even started my history folio yet. I'm in really deep shit. :|

I'm going for my church camp in 2 days! Haven't packed anything at all yet. Anyway, from the picture above, I think you can roughly guess where my church camp is held. Well, if you have no idea where it's held, then I'll just tell you straight. -___- It's in Genting!

You know what? Screw folios and studying, I don't want to think about them. :) It's the holidays, it's time to RELAX and ENJOYYYY! :P

WeiBeng.
Oh yeah, I just cut my hair. =\

Lakers to the Finals!

2009-05-30T20:05:00.000+08:00

Yeah! Lakers taking the title this season 08-09! With Kobe leading them to infinity and beyond!

Kobe Bryant

No.24 doing his thing

WHO'S GOING TO WIN THE
FINALS THIS YEAR?!!

LAKERS!!!!!

WeiBeng.
Lakers 08-09

I'm still not alright. :(

2009-05-27T23:10:00.000+08:00

Hahaha, what am I crapping about? I'm perfectly fine! Only if you knew what I meant by I'm not alright. :P Anyway, exams are indirectly over, just not official yet! :)

Seriously, you have got to watch this, really good stuff. I'm not appreciating the video cause I'm gay or anything. Just to clarify. :P

Enjoy.

WeiBeng.
I ain't bouncin!

Time flies slowly on purpose.

2009-05-26T13:48:00.000+08:00

History paper killed me today. Altogether including the questions I didn't know at all, and those that I weren't sure is 22 questions. So that's like 33 marks gone, GONE. :( Ah, whatever laaa. I'm not the kiasu type so don't really care.

My heart, Your home.
Just one of those songs to get me through the day.

Funny thing, my monitor is working pretty fine now. I hope it stays that way, or maybe not. I'm not complaining if my dad wants to buy me a new one. :P

Anyway, hope it rains today! Was hoping it would rain yesterday, but it looks gloomy today. So people, START SINGING!

WeiBeng.
2 more days.

In just 3 days.

2009-05-25T14:48:00.000+08:00

Exams will be over in 3 more days. Then it's time to partyyy! :P But I'm actually rather scared of the holidays. :( I think I'll keep on studying through out the whole holidays. Because knowing me, 1 week break after exams is 1 month break.

Just like the last March exam, I said 1 week break and I'll continue studying, but what happen? :(

That's me, using the computer 24/7

I have history and geography tests left. The two main courses that I've to swallow down. Well, lets see how well am I going to do in this exam? I'll just say I'm going to maintain my results, and that's about it.

In everyone's life, there comes a time where.. one has to make a decision. It's a phase, where everyone has to go through, and I've come to that point..... I just can't stand it any longer, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

I HAVE TO FREAKING CUT MY HAIR!

Because the weather is so hot, I can't take it anymore. :( It's time to cut my hair. Hahaha, did you think it was something serious? :P Heh heh. Let's see, what hairstyle should I cut? Hmm... got a few ideas.

Err.. maybe not.

WeiBeng.
Dorky Geeky.